The Bear Is Back In Town

Ok. Enough vacation. Bear is back!

First, the insincere formalities... Happy New Year to everyone, and I trust the Fat Man in the Red Suit was good to you all.

That done, for those readers remotely interested in my trip, here's a quick summary...

Day 1
Flew to LA via Papeete with Air Tahiti Nui. Food was great. Seat was broken. In flight entertainment system was also broken. Ah well. needed to sleep anyway.

Day 1 (reloaded)
It's one of the curious things about flying from West to East across the Pacific. You actually arrive before you've left. Don't ask me how it works... the whole thing makes my head hurt.
Picked up car, drove to Long Beach, checked in, then set off on a quest for a phone sim-card.
It's one of the other curious things about traveling... the Global Roaming feature on your phone costs way way way more than having the call redirected to a local cell phone. Ended up doing a tour of the Queen Mary, led by this curious man who must have thought we were all 10 year olds. It's impossible to describe his performance in a blog... I guess you had to be there.

Day 2
Drove to Newport Beach and did the little boat tour around the harbour, mostly staring at homes owned by people with way too much money. Lucky them. Perhaps one day soon, I'll have too much money too.

Day 3
Drove from LA to Vegas, via somewhere that looked like it could have been the surface of Mars. Don't recall the sudden acceleration of lift-off though, so we must have still been on earth. Stopped at a couple of outlet malls on the way, and paid US$49 for a pair of Rockport walking shoes... these really are most comfortable shoes I've ever owned. (RRP in Oz... A$229... woo hoo).
Met CAW for dinner, did the 'tourist on the strip' thing outside the Belagio fountain etc etc.

Day 4
Spent the day with CAW, the three of us wandering around Vegas looking suspiciously like foreign tourists. Picked up tickets to a dog act... no... the act wasn't a dog... the act contained dogs doing tricks... all rescue dogs too. Got called up on stage, did a trick with a yo-yo and bread stick (me with bread stick, performer with yo-yo). Was given free tickets to a midget (sorry... little people) show that night for my trouble.
The midget show was a hoot... little people impersonating big stars... got called up on stage (again). I think the magician liked me nearly as much as he liked his sequined jacket and matching shoes. Was given tickets to a hypnotist show that night for my trouble. Decided that track record of inclusion exposed me to some risk of further embarrassment, so gave the tickets to a curious couple from Sacramento who were sitting in front of us.

Day 5
Dr J went to an all day seminar thingmy, leaving CAW and me free to hit the roller coaster at New York New York. Have I ever mentioned how much I love Roller Coasters. The two of us criss crossed Sin City... bought a T-shirt at the Titanic exhibition, bought a T-shirt at Star Trek, and ended up having a drink and fries at Quarks.

Day 6
Ah well... it was a "business trip", so the morning was spent attending the opening addresses at the World Cognress on Antiaging Medicine.
Someone named Ron Paul gave the keynote address. I understand he's a presidential candidate. I'm sure he's a nice guy, and I'm sure he passionately believes whatever it is he believes, but until he stops rambling incoherently, he's not going to get far in the primaries.
Spent the afternoon with Dr J and CAW, wandering around the exhibition, which was a mix of snake oil and some "wow" stuff... there was a guy with a laser beam who fixed my banged up knee in about 3 minutes, and a company selling this diagnostic system that used "resonance radio frequencies" to decide what was wrong with you by detecting "Spikes" in your pulse as the thing cycled through a range of frequencies. Hmmmm... you know... I have a really open mind for this sort of stuff, but I'm afraid that one didn't grab my attention.
Wandered downstairs to the Rodeo show, which was a HUGE HUGE HUGE market, full of stuff cowboys might like. Unsurprisingly, didn't find anything I liked. Ah well.

Day 7
Said goodbye to CAW (shed a few tears), then went shopping with Dr J. By this time, the conference had become a little tedious.

Day 8
Last day of the conference. Dr J and I decided we'd better give the exhibition one last look, nearly won a Mini (which might have been difficult, though not impossible, to take home on the plane), and stumbled on a new business opportunity (that doesn't involve any of those awful multi level marketing companies). I might share it with you some other time.

Day 9
Drove back to LA via the plains of Mars and some more outlet malls. Went back to the previous outlet mall too, to get me another pair of them Rockports. Incredibly, the sales assistant remembered us, and extended the "2nd pair at half price" to include the pair I'd bought on the way up. Therefore, paid twenty four bucks for them (A$RRP = $229... now THAT'S shopping). Stopped at a curious "ghost town" called Calico. If I'd known it was owned by the folks who own Knotts Berry Farm, we might not have bothered.

Day 10
Flew to Tahiti. Different aeroplane, more great food and service, another broken seat, and another entertainment system that didn't quite work. Checked into hotel and found air conditioning not working. Got moved to another room. Air conditioning only marginally better, but at 2am, am way too tired to bother doing anything about it. Bags somewhere in the hotel, and the manager is confident they'll be found by morning.

Day 11
Jack hammers? No. That can't be right.
Look out Manager. There's nothing worse than a bear with a sore head. Got upgraded to a suite, and eventually got out bags. Took a bus into town, looked at the price of pearls, and immediately got back on the bus to the hotel.
Dinner. How much? $35. For a burger and fries? At a bistro. Really? Hmmm... how long can a human go without food? We decided not to risk it and ate something.

Day 12
Swam. Ate. Swam some more. Read. Read some more. Swam. Ate. Drank. Read. Swam. That pretty much sums it up.

Day 13
Took a 4 wheel drive tour across the middle of the island, through the volcano crater. Amazing. Might share some pics as soon as I can figure out how to download them from the camera.

Day 14
See day 12, then add swimming with stingrays in the lagoon. They're soft. No teeth, though my paw did get gummed. Dr J wondered why they don't make good handbags and shoes. Maybe they do.

Day 15
We have to be at the airport at what time? Oh my. And then the plane was running two hours late. Couldn't they have told us that at 4am?
Arrived back home the next day, though I'm sure we were only in the air a few hours. More of that head hurting time zone stuff. Oh... seat was working, and entertainment system worked. This time it was Dr J who had the broken stuff. Thought about offering to swap seats, but pretended to be asleep instead.

And that was the Bear's big adventure, more or less.